December 7, 2011

10 Reasons Facebook Spanks Twitter's Ass



1) "Following" people seems too much like stalking. If I want to get to know someone why am I "following" them? Why wouldn't I reach out in an actual conversation by commenting?

2) If you aren't on Twitter *right now* you miss shit. Facebook is more like a bulletin board you can leave messages on and pick up the conversation no matter the time zone. I've met people from all over the world this way. Love it.

3) The ability to filter who sees my ramblings. If I want to screen who sees what I post on Facebook, I can. On Twitter, once it's out there, it's OUT THERE for everyone to retweet, see, and laugh their asses off at you. And honestly, who do you want hearing about work issues and that your looking for a new job -- your boss or your friends in the industry with connections?

4) Tweets usually contain messages with abbreviated text and acronyms. It drives me effing bat shit crazy. Takes me twice as long to decipher WTF the sender means. And yes, I'm aware that last sentence makes me a hypocrite.

5) Twitter is ugly. A user's wall is one big background banner and a bunch of tweets. Really? How sad is that to look at when you are trying to connect with people? Sure, Twitter is trying to keep up by allowing pictures, but let's face it, they still suck donkey balls.

6) Select what I want to read and from whom. If I don't want to read the drivel one of my FB friends is spewing, I can select which types of posts I want to receive from them: all, most, lifetime moments, or nothing. I haven't done that to anyone yet, but I have a feeling with the upcoming presidential election year I may have to just to stop the influx of people spouting their opinions on candidates (helpful hint: your folks told you it's not polite to discuss politics and religion at parties for a reason. It's so we all don't have to experience how narrow minded you really are).

7) The two-second ability to edit my update. With Twitter I can delete and repost, but with FB I can actually correct a typo if I spot it fast enough. (hey, if you are reading this FB people, please insert an edit function like Google+, they at least got that part right. Oh, and while we're at it, take away the stupid option that hitting my enter key automatically posts my reply. Most users have no idea to do the shift + enter key for a paragraph break and I hate reading the "opps, it posted before I meant" babble. Another issue that would be fixed with an edit option.)

8) Spammers. 'Nuff said, right? These jerks seem to love Twitter, but don't bug people as much on FB. Dude, do not send me penis links or links to your porn site. Nor should a business "follow" me and then send me links to their product sites.

9) Twitter's lists suck when compared to Facebook's smart & friend lists. Sure, it makes it easy to check on certain people's latest Tweets, but it's still a jumbled mess if you have one person who tweets like twenty times a freakin hour. Why am I grouping people in lists for Twitter when it doesn't seem to have any functionality with who sees my Tweets?

10) Hashtag happy fools. You know #thepeople I'm #talkingabout. They want to group everything with search-ability hashtags. Are they aware that when searching for a desired phrase via Twitter, the search will populate with all matching findings, whether there is a damn hashtag on it or not?

Tune in next for why Google+ is never going to beat Facebook either. Why don't you all just drink the freakin kool-aid and learn to use it correctly? Sure, your grandma, your second grade teacher, your neighbor, your dry cleaner, and your high school crush might all be using it, but they haven't all mastered it.

Seriously? Why are you still using Twitter? Do you like having only 140 characters to express yourself? Or do you like having to send multiple Tweets and DMs to get your simple message across? I'll be the first to speak up and shout it: Twitter Sucks.

Facebook is an invaluable tool to the people who take the time to actually learn the ins and outs of it. I think I'd kiss Mark Zuckerberg if I got the chance, and yeah, he'd dig it.

:-D



~~ C.J. Ellisson ~~
Guest Speaker at Vamps at Sea – A vampire themed cruise to Alaska 6.23.2012


5 comments:

Teri said...

LIKE!

C.J. Ellisson said...

Thanks, Teri!

James Garcia Jr said...

Who needs a hug? ;)
Hi, stranger. I'm still trying to figure out what works for me and what doesn't. *sigh* I'm on both pretty equally at the moment. Tomorrow, who know? Perhaps it will be a constant re-evaluation. We'll see. How can I complain? A couple of years ago, no one was reading my words. Right?
Take care, C.J., and continued success to you in all you do. *hugs*

-Jimmy

Marissa Farrar said...

I love twitter! I've met loads of cool people on there and I love the retweet option. It's possible to reach a whole heap of people you'd otherwise have never made contact with. However, I totally agree with you about the missing things point. You've got to be on it all the time to keep up with conversations! I like facebook as well, but I do spend more time on twitter!

C.J. Ellisson said...

Hey Jimmy and Marissa! Sorry to be replying so late. Went away early for a long weekend and stayed off lien as much as I could.

Good for you on Twitter, Jimmy! I just can't hack both.

Wow, Marissa! I had no idea you spent more time on Twitter! I'd say check your sales figures from when you started using Twitter more and see if it helped or they stayed the same…. then switch to FB and spend the same amount of time and see if sales change.

I've found my sales have increased since I started advertising and interacting more with folk on FB, but it could just be a lucky fluke, too.

Wishing you both a great holiday and I appreciate you stopping by to read my fun post!

See? Not Talkin' Out My Ass!

About this blog:

"Who the heck is this C.J. chick?"

Sure, you may not have heard of me and that's okay. I may not have heard of you either ;-) But ask yourself this one simple question -- What were you doing in January 2009 and had you ever written one word of fiction?

I can tell you where I was. I spent days in doctor's offices and sitting at home the rest of the time, wondering what the heck I was going to do with my time now that my property management and Realtor business was on hold for the foreseeable future.

That's right, I never wrote a fictional piece before and I never thought I could be a writer. Heck, my background is Art, Science and Business… not English, Journalism, or Creative Writing.

Now, I'm an award-winning bestselling author of contemporary fantasy. In under three years. And I have 10,000 followers on facebook. Do you? 'Cause if you do then you probably don't need my help. ;-)

Side Note: I use an editor for all my books (several in fact), but not on my blog posts. So if you see errors, try to be nice and overlook them.

Please comment on the posts you find helpful -- I look forward to getting to know you!

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